You need to complete a healthy relationship quiz to see where you rate in the healthy relationship stakes. It may be an opportunity for you to find out how to develop healthy relationships, and learn the traits of a healthy relationship, as you may not be clear about this.
The first thing to let you know about the primary characteristics of healthy relationships, is that there needs to be equality between you.
In my view it is not possible to have the elements of a healthy relationship unless you and your partner have equal status, and this needs to be one of the top relationship questions in your healthy relationship quiz. Unless there is equality between you, you will have endless relationship issues that will afflict you the whole time, leading to one long serious relationship problem.
The reason I tell you this is because during all my years as a counselor, one of the most common problems in a relationship I have dealt with, is inequality.
I came to refer to it as the 'same old story' because I came across it so often. The reason why it creates such common marriage relationship problems, is because you have a situation where there is an imbalance between you. This means you are not on the same level as there is an unevenness between you, making it very difficult for you to function at all. It's a bit like having a vehicle with four wheels that are all different sizes. Can you imagine how lopsided it would be, and how impossible it would be to operate such a vehicle?
The first thing to let you know about the primary characteristics of healthy relationships, is that there needs to be equality between you.
In my view it is not possible to have the elements of a healthy relationship unless you and your partner have equal status, and this needs to be one of the top relationship questions in your healthy relationship quiz. Unless there is equality between you, you will have endless relationship issues that will afflict you the whole time, leading to one long serious relationship problem.
The reason I tell you this is because during all my years as a counselor, one of the most common problems in a relationship I have dealt with, is inequality.
I came to refer to it as the 'same old story' because I came across it so often. The reason why it creates such common marriage relationship problems, is because you have a situation where there is an imbalance between you. This means you are not on the same level as there is an unevenness between you, making it very difficult for you to function at all. It's a bit like having a vehicle with four wheels that are all different sizes. Can you imagine how lopsided it would be, and how impossible it would be to operate such a vehicle?
And so it is with your healthy relationship quiz. It is essential you have equality as your first answer as the imbalance otherwise leads to numerous relationship problems, not least of all, are relationship communication problems.
When you have equality between you, as one of the traits of a healthy relationship, it means you do not have relationship communication problems.
It means you relate as equals, and function smoothly like a vehicle with four wheels of equal size. You respect and acknowledge each other, and one way this is demonstrated is that you each listen to the other, rather than having the relationship communication problems that are associated with having an imbalance.
The results of your healthy relationship quiz, will provide the relationship help you are looking for, if you recognize there is an imbalance between you.
It would not surprise me if you do discover inequality between you, as this is the case with so many couples, many of whom don't recognize this, or acknowledge it.
Often it can be so subtle. There are things that happen that are not seen in this light. There are many circumstances in emotionally abusive relationships, or mentally abusive relationships, that fit into this category.
The subtle aspect can be connected to the supposed humor often associated with this type of abusive relationship, and this can be confusing for the person on the receiving end.
Occasionally I watch programs like Dr Phil and the Oprah Winfrey Show. They are often dealing with some aspects of abusive relationships or sexual abuse, highlighting how these features are common and widespread.
If you do realize inequality is one of the answers to your healthy relationship quiz test, it will be vital for you to take steps to do something about one of the most common problems in a relationship. As I have said, this is what I have found in my experience, and one comes across it so often otherwise as well.
Some time ago I gave a talk to a group of about 30 women in a private dwelling that had no difficulty catering for such a large number of people. They were all impeccably dressed and most had arrived in late model up-market vehicles. In other words, it was a 'well-to-do' group of women.
My talk was titled "Subtle Aspects of Abuse in Relationships." I had their full attention. It was so quiet you could have heard a pin drop. After my talk I had a significant number of them wanting to come and see me as clients, as they became aware they would not have passed a healthy relationship quiz test.
I may have been laboring the point somewhat in what I have written here, but equality is one of the essential characteristics of healthy relationships, and if this is not one of the elements of your relationship, it needs to be addressed.
When you do make the necessary changes, you will pass the healthy relationship quiz with flying colors, and this will enhance your relationship and life experience, otherwise you will be missing out big time!
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